…Why? I thought I was able to let go of this pattern of thinking. I don’t need to know, I’m trying to give myself the room I need. Remind myself of all the knowledge I’ve gathered but still I take the ‘pros & cons’ -list out of my pocket and I start to list of things just to alter it more to the ‘pro’ side because I don’t want to let go the thought of you. My mind is most of the time looking to the future. I want to see all the potential, all the potential there is in one. Can’t you see what I can see? My subjective reality calculates what you could be, not who you’ve been or what are you now, it sees one only full of possibilities. What this makes out of me? Naive? I paint pictures with such a big brush of potential that at times I forget the realities of the world and the fact that I’m not a fortuneteller.But still, I want to know, who you are? Who you could be? I want to see, how you bloom and why? I’m riding with those undertones. Why you became the person you’re? Because what I see is something extraordinary. Is it only my mind playing tricks with me? I find everyone interesting by default and I’m curious about others but…if you can break into the field that surrounds me, the field that is built on experiences, freedom, and independence, you’ve made it to a land that is sacred to me. If I would stop for a moment for you, that is like I would give a piece of my core to share with you. It is more than the combination of the sacred. But it does bother me, will I ever find it comfortable to stay still long enough to give you a chance to build a home next to me?I keep guessing, I keep searching. How does it feel like to take a leap to the unknown with someone? I’m looking back, I know how to leave all you have built and take a leap into unknown. Oh, it feels like riding on a unicorn in a sky that is coloured by rainbows and at the same time it is painful as walking on a thin ice and drop into the deadly cold water. You wrap all the life you’ve had and say goodbye to the person you were. You re-learn yourself, it is an agonising but rewarding process. What are the possibilities when you mix two people into this soup? Potential, huge amount of potential but will our past always hunt us down like an arrow find its way in the hand of an archer to its prey and mix the soup with spices of our past disappointments, hurt, suspicious and fear?Pics are from Helsinki, Finland.